7 Years


This picture is among our favorites because of its humor. It’s one of the many exaggerated snippets of how we thought our marriage drama might play out. But thank goodness, throughout our real seven years of marriage, that scenario has never once materialized. In fact, it is he who always comes home with hands full of shopping bags, NTUC FairPrice bags, that is.

Joke asides, we believe that physical maintenance (within our means) does have a part to play in a healthy marriage. One of the many valuable marital advices I am blessed to receive is: wives need to stay attractive for their husbands. And vice versa. I love that it says “to stay attractive” instead of “to be attractive,” meaning it affirms that there already was something attractive about his bride that delighted a husband from the beginning, and this quality is what a wife works on to maintain. May be it’s her being an interesting conversation partner, which she maintains by keeping herself enriched through good reads, or her outlook, which she maintains by taking care of herself and keeping a healthy lifestyle.

I also love that it says “for their husbands” for therein lies their reason and standard for being attractive. It’s not meant for other men nor is it meant for their own vanity. And because such beauty is relational, as she grows her loving relationship with her husband, so also will her beauty in the eyes of his.

Now, we may think it superficial, after all marriage vow is a vow of regardless. Regardless of financial situation, regardless of physical condition. So why the talk of staying attractive?

I know of many busy young moms who don’t even have the luxury of taking a decent shower daily, been there done that myself. And in all honesty, with two young children and another baby joining us soon, staying attractive is not easy—at all. But like all good things, marriage needs working out, working hard. Staying attractive needs effort, a lot of effort for many, but it tells our spouses that they are well worth the effort, regardless.

Remember what once made your spouse’s heart skip a beat? Let’s work on keeping that beat skipped, every once in while (please note that it’s clinically advisable to keep it steady for almost all the time). 😉

Blessed seven years, love! Low or high, you are the main reason for all the maintenance. May the good Lord grant us many, many more years of delighting in each other. ❤

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